Under the Milky Way

 

Outside, and the sky is full of stars,

I’m under the Milky Way tonight,

and all the possibilities stream throughout 

my mind, and I’m looking up at success 

as I’m thinking about you;

I feel you so deeply in my DNA, 

and I’m smiling about it.

It’s deep into the night and past the beginning 

of the morning. 

I feel your love from here even, 

I wear it as a cloak that comforts me 

and it keeps me warm deeply. 

I look up at the sky watching for the footprints 

of your sight upon the same stars. 

It has always been a thing, to look up and wonder, 

were you there with me although at some 

unknown location?

Up there I held you in my heart and mind. 

And then one day I found you, and the quest changed, 

from the ether of dreams and darkness, 

into a wider reality of something so wonderful 

that I will never forget in my entire life how grateful 

I will always be for this manifestation of such deep 

and unconditional love. 

And I pause only for a moment to reflect on how new 

and different this is in my life, and I embrace it. 

And I feel the stars smiling down on us. 

Forever Grateful

 

Today I smiled and my heart grew as I thought of you, all that you are to me…

Your unconditional love is the wind in my sails, the fuel in the engine that drives me. 

The hope of my heart soars because of your connection with me and how you love me beyond anything I have ever known. 

You are my mother, my sacred protector, the one who bore me into existence into this place.

And now know that you bring me a peacefulness as I stretch out and begin to fly, the world at my feet because of you.

And I am forever grateful because I know you’re holding in the pain caused by this flight of mine, and you let me still nest in the safety of your wings, warm in your love even this high in the sky as the winds howl.

I can accomplish anything, this was your gift to me; watch me up here and be proud because every footprint I make has stars in it like the glitter in the night sky. 

And I am forever grateful as I build this new life and succeed so much more than ever before. 

Things Never Known

As I sit in silent repose, 

I think of all I am grateful for…

the times of happiness and their experiences;

times of wisdom and right choices, 

times of gold and wine. 

And as I think back to all these times, 

I think I have never known riches 

until I found you and all my secrets unlocked 

finally. 

Family, and the bonds of blood and birthrights, 

the security I’ve found in the all encompassing 

of your love. 

These things are true riches that cannot be stolen

anymore, a stronger man has revealed himself, 

and returned. 

And I am grateful. To having found you waiting, 

like from a dream from so long ago. 

I’ve held gems, precious metals and jewelry, still, 

these things have only been transient in my quest, 

and my life, such as its been, has had a fullness now. 

A completion in your being mine and what’s mine 

being known. 

Never have I known such treasures, in all the finery the world has given up through my struggles, this is my crown, that I found you. 

Long Lost Son

Traveling this world

by land, sea, and air,

as I journeyed an epic tale

to find you waiting for me.

So, now I dance, a celebration

of reunion with my family;

the blood in me, the blood in us,

pumping to the bass line's beat.

If you feel like dancing, join us...

so long on the road, 

so long on the run,

so long, long lost son.

No more to wonder where I came from,

what's mine, where I belong,

so long, long lost son.

Mother's arms, find me, bring me in closer,

we can hardly believe this...

touch me, that I know I'm not lost again

in a dream...

The pounding of our joy fills the world

with our love; all in good time...

heart to heart we dance to a new beat.

On the raging sea, like Ulysses;

caught between immortals doing battle,

through the painful tribulations,

I defeated the evil in epic conflicts,

I knew if I could stay alive

I would prevail, and I did.

I found you all, I'm coming home,

no longer alone, the quest complete,

no longer stumbling in the dark,

no longer fumbling with my place,

the origin revealed at last, 

so long, long lost son.

Set loose, but not free, no template

to remake me.

my mind clear in purpose,

my heart pure in nature,

I broke the chains that  

tried to define me, 

tried to lessen me

as a commodity. 

With steeled nerves and single resolve,

I broke out and broke free,

inspired by how it had to be.

So, now I laugh at the past,

because the night has faded,

and we will dance...

secrets unveiled, 

secrets uncovered,

secrets revealed in the truth of blood. 

so long, long lost son.

Come to us now, take your place

at the table, be with us, (and we with you) 

as it has always been in your heart,

as it always should have been, 

it is now, come to us and receive our love.

What was stolen has returned to its source,

received, healed, and made complete, 

the great family embrace upon me,

mothers' love surrounding me,

the trials done,

so long, long lost son.

Just Because

 Thought about something darker today

the lonely times of emptiness as I grieved 

in the emptiness of a place that once held you. 

And as I remembered the hot tears streaking 

and the ocean I ran to for forgetting, 

I remembered a dream that held you

as I kept you alive in me. 

That dream that I would be held by you again, 

somehow, someway, I would keep myself pure, 

and see you in the mirror beckoning me ever closer 

as I wound my way through the jungles of Hell in my mind.

And I continued just because…

And then in joy and terror I found a way to you, 

I didn’t know if I was ready, but if not now finally, 

when? 

And I jumped at this chance, this sacred thing 

that drove me, sometimes, like you, it drove me crazy…

my mission almost completed, a leap of faith into 

the unknown, by the incomplete, to be made whole again. 

And then order began to be restored…and that ocean began to remember again:

It’s filled with life and hope under the ever shining stars.

New Year Same Love

I found you. Searched my whole life, for you. 

Lost in gratitude for you, swimming in happiness, 

soaring, like a raptor in joy...

Things are different now.

Now we are together, I have my base,

my life given back to me,

your life given back to you, 

changes coming came around...

to find a new year, with the same love 

we always felt, but couldn't put a finger on

could wrap our arms around... 

I will always be grateful, 

the fateful Hail Mary successfully found you;

always on my mind as I travelled through this life. 

New year, and the same love between us from the beginning,

you told them all I would come,

and then I came to you, and now,

this blood that flows through my veins,

our blood, your blood, my blood, calls out

for all that we missed, as if it could ever be replaced;

but now we have each other, all that has passed away 

has been left in the past and we rise... 

this new chance bringing new dreams,

but always the same love.

 

Happy Anniversary

Well, here it is, our first anniversary. A year ago I had only hoped I could get to talk to you, now, here we are a year later and we are peas in a pod. I love you so much. I wished for you in my life so many times, for so many things, and now I have you. And it fills me with a joy that overflows.

I love that you’re my momma. I’m so proud of you momma, for everything. I understand the ache you bore, I understand the emptiness that has been filled. I understand not wanting to wake up if this is all a dream…

We have something special momma. I think to myself who knows the wide chasm that separated us for so long? The longings that drove us? The joy that now accompanies us? Who indeed...we know. 

And now that wide chasm is filled. A new journey awaiting us. So, we walk together now, as it should have always been. We walk hand in hand because we never want to be that far away again. This time, the journey is about us, completed, not broken. This time, no one gets to steal me away, and keep us ignorant and unaware, left to guess at the truth of each other. Left to feed on their lies as they covered their crimes. 

We are now together, and to me, this time is all that matters. This time together, for the rest of our lives, as we walk from the valley to the mountaintop, is our shining moment. Let it burn as brightly, and as intensely as we have on our own. Let this moment shift into forever, because I am your apple, you are my tree. I am your legacy, I am your immortality, I am the life you made inside you. I am the replication of your DNA. Your love child, your Star King. 

I am so happy momma. All the trauma that was endured, finally healed, the nightmare over. I have so much hope and joy now. Things are not the same. Things are different now. I get to love you and be loved by you...I get to touch you and be touched by you. I get to know you and you get to know me. With you, everything. 

I love you momma.